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Here are over 100 ideas to help you keep monogamy hot!
1. Find out what music your lover likes, and play it.
2. Sing to each other, especially if you can't sing. Listen to a song that turns you on and write the words out so you will remember them. Then without any music sing that song as a surprise gift to your lover. Watch the tears come to their eyes.
3. Find out what scents your lover likes, e.g., perfumes and especially essential oils. Get an essential oil diffuser.
4. Wear the clothes your lover likes. Try something wild in latex.
5. Serve the food your lover likes.
6. Select locations for lovemaking that your partner likes.
7. Prepare yourself for stimulating conversation. Do some homework if necessary to have something interesting to talk about.
8. Give lots of compliments on a regular basis.
9. Compliment you lover in front of others.
10. Tell each other all the things you like and appreciate about each other. Do this every day.
11. Show your body to your lover. Let them look as long as they like.
12. Take your clothes off while your lover watches.
13. Tease your partner with partial nudity at unexpected times, like when your mother or children are in the other room. Be artful and naughty about it so only your lover sees you.
14. Explore each other's bodies with your eyes, hands and tongues.
15. Hold a mirror for your partner to look at their own genitals.
16. Women, touch your lover's genitals with sighs of desire from time to time, even when out in public (discretely).
17. Men, nibble on your partner's neck with sighs of desire from time to time, even when out in public.
18. Give each other a sensual massage. Try short 5 minute full body massages on a daily basis, as well as longer versions (one hour or longer) when time permits. Use an exotic massage oil. You can mix some yourself with an excellent essential oil in a base of first cold press grapeseed (canola) oil.
19. Create a temple-of-love space in anticipation of your lovemaking. Make your space beautiful. Keep it simple.
20. Create your own rituals & ceremonies. Keep it simple.
21. Tell each other what turns you on. If they don't know they can't give it to you.
22. Read and/or write erotic poetry and stories.
23. Watch erotic, romantic movies and videos.
24. Take a bath or shower together. Even small tubs are great fun. Make a mess.
25. Wash each other's bodies. Be kind and gentle and provocative, or raucous and wild, whatever you're both into.
26. Wash each other's feet. Use a small dishpan and some wonderful natural soap. Rub on an aromatic foot lotion.
27. Suck on your partner's squeaky-clean toes.
28. Feed each other food and drink. Use your fingers. Make a mess.
29. Read stories out loud to each other.
30. Wear costumes and masks as part of your foreplay. Oooh, mystery!
31. Tie each other up. Men especially love to be tied up.
32. Paint each other's bodies. Use washable/edible body paint or chocolate sauce you make yourself or buy.
33. Wash each other's hair.
34. Give each other pedicures.
35. Prepare sensual meals together. Fondle and tease each other as you work/play.
36. Watch the sun come up or go down, or the moon go across the water.
37. Lie out under the stars. Sleep out under the stars.
38. Make flower arrangements together, fresh or dried.
39. Send each other erotic post cards without any special occasion.
40. Write love letters to each other.
41. Say the words "I love you. I need you. I want you."
42. Whisper words of adoration in your lover's ears before, during and after love making.
43. Talk "dirty" in your lover's ears in the heat of passion during your lovemaking.
44. Hold hands in public.
45. Go on picnics.
46. Call each other by "sucky" pet names.
47. Make foreplay go on and on and on and on and....
48. Men, help your woman come to orgasm before intercourse - at least some times!
49. Men, be sure she is wet, before you put your golden rod into her fig pocket!
50. Romance each other for hours, with intercourse on and off the whole time. Men, learn to delay ejaculation!
51. Cuddle after intercourse. Look into each other's eyes. Say words of love and adoration. Thank the God and Goddess for their favors.
52. Cry in front of each other.
53. Share what you are feeling. Risk being vulnerable.
54. Try different lovemaking positions. Experiment.
55. Try different lovemaking locations. Experiment.
56. Use love toys. Experiment.
57. Laugh during intercourse. Laugh before intercourse. Laugh after intercourse.
58. Offer unexpected gifts. Keep it simple, but thoughtful. Pick the right thing, not the biggest or most expensive thing.
59. Remember special occasions. Special occasions should be special!
60. Say please and thank you for sexual favors and for many small things each day. “Whether the pretty woman grants or withholds her favors, she always likes to be asked for them.” Ovid
61. Surprise your lover with the unexpected. Experiment.
62. Try something new. Experiment.
63. Try something dangerous. Experiment.
64. Try something outrageous. Experiment.
65. Try something kinky. Experiment.
66. Try something you are afraid of. Experiment.
67. Try something forbidden. Experiment.
68. Share your fantasies. Act them out with each other. Don't ever share fantasies about someone else with your lover!
69. Masturbate each other.
70. Masturbate in front of each other.
71. Dress up for a romantic dinner.
72. Eat dinner by candlelight.
73. Make love by candlelight.
74. Put on little skits (acts) for each other. Experiment.
75. Be foolish and playful. Experiment.
76. Drop something that is really important for you to do, and make love instead.
77. Call when you are away and say "I miss you terribly. I can't wait to get home to hold you."
78. Talk "dirty" over the phone to each other.
79. Shop for sex toys and lingerie together.
80. Ladies, wear garter belt and stockings instead of pantyhose.
81. Put blindfolds on each other during foreplay and intercourse, sometimes.
82. Role play: innocent high school student, slut, nurse, stripper, master, slave, bad boy or girl, etc.
83. Look into each other's eyes, if possible until tears follow the opening of your heart in love.
84. Match the rhythm of your breathing during lovemaking.
85. Take rapid breaths to heat up your excitement.
86. Take long, deep, slow breaths to maintain a high level of excitement without going over into orgasm. Prolonging the orgasmic excitement leads to ecstasy.
87. Just hold each other.
88. Talk where one only listens. The one who listens does not try to take any responsibility, does not try to intervene or "fix" anything. Just listen. This is harder to do than it sounds.
89. Give each other a 10-second kiss when coming and going.
90. Make out like high school kids, without intercourse.
91. Practice Tantra Sacred Sex muscle control, breathing and visualization together. If you don't know how, take a workshop together.
92. Give each other flowers regularly. Men love to receive flowers too!
93. Have fresh flowers around as often as possible.
94. Have lots of green healthy plants in the house.
95. Notice all the little things you do for each other, that you regularly take for granted, and let each other know how important they are to you. Show your appreciation.
96. Spend time remembering wondrous past experiences together when you were happy and joyous.
97. Take turns leading when dancing slow.
98. In conversation always use loving names when referring to your genitals, e.g., jade stalk, wand of light, mystery cave, succulent flower, etc.
99. Make plans for the future.
100. Talk about spending the rest of your life together.
101. Write out your vision for the kind of relationship you want to create together.
102. Display your relationship vision/dream where you will see it often.
103. Serve each other breakfast in bed.
104. Sleep together NAKED! Curl around each other like spoons. Roll over together to change positions in the night.
105. In the morning when you wake up lying naked together, the man goes between the woman’s legs. If he is not aroused, he will use the soft entry by wetting his penis with saliva (or any suitable lubricant such as water based or silicone lubricants, or any cooking oil) and inserting it into her vagina. Lie still with your eyes open and match your breathing for 2-5 minutes.
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For many men, to retain semen is not the norm. Most men try to lose as much as they possibly can, but for the Chinese martial artist, semen retention is a part of the life-force, or energy that's needed for good health, stamina, strength and longevity. Having said that, we Chinese martial artists love having sex, it's just very important to retain the semen. When you use it, you lose it. Have you noticed that women live longer than men? That's because they don't orgasm as much as men, therefore, not losing their life-force.
In times gone by, the more well-to-do Chinese had many concubines. These were women that the man of the house would engage in sexual pleasure with. It was thought that he had so many women just for pleasure, and because he was rich, he could afford so many woman. It was thought, that he had so many women so he could "lay his seed" in them. Actually, he was bedding them to make them reach climax, this way he could steal their energy. How could these men sleep with so many women and not reach orgasm themselves? How were they able to keep their semen, and steal their lovers life-force? They practiced what is called semen retention exercises.
It's a common misconception that all Chinese people know martial arts. In the old days, martial arts were only taught to the rich, military, and to the Imperial Guards. Internal, or "closed door" martial arts were only taught to the high ranking officers and the most elite of Chinese society. They were the privileged, they were the only people "good" enough to receive this type of training. Semen retention exercises were only taught to those in this "closed door" setting.
Semen retention exercises are very simple to do, and take very little time. The exercises are done in the evening when you're going to bed. You will also practice all day whenever you have to urinate. Then there are the exercises that you have to practice while you are making love. In the beginning you will start notice that you can last longer with your lover, as you continue with the exercises, you will have control over your orgasm, and ejaculate when you want to. Early in the practice of semen retention, you will last 15 to 25 minutes, as you progress, you will find yourself lasting 45 minutes to an hour! Keep doing the exercises and when you reach climax, you will feel the orgasm, but you will not ejaculate.
Some simple exercises to begin practicing would be to stop the flow of urination. When urinating, constrict your sphincter by squeezing your butt cheeks together. This technique is called the "pelvic lock". Do this exercise daily, also put the pelvic lock into place several times during urination. Another simple exercise to do is performed while you are making love. When you start to feel like the orgasm is coming on (don't wait too long) put the pelvic lock on, then start rubbing the tip of your penis up and down her vaginal opening, thus stimulating her, while you get control of your orgasm.
What happens when you are lasting longer with her in bed, and bringing her to climax, making her orgasm, your penis will act like a straw, sucking the energy out of her, and depositing her strength and energy into your "life-force account". Listen, haven't you noticed after having sex and you ejaculate, you're ready to go to sleep. If she didn't orgasm, she's ready to go watch television. You got her excited, hot, ready to go, heated up, then gave her your energy, your strength, your life-force. Keep doing this and she will live longer, be healthier, but definitely not happier.
Semen Retention NoWeightsWorkout © 2004
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Definition: Benign prostatic hypertrophy is swelling of Prostate gland. The prostate is a walnut sized gland that is only present in men. It is located just below the bladder and top of the penis. This gland surrounds the urethra (the tube through which urine flows from the bladder and out through the penis).
It is a very astonishing fact to know that the condition BPH has been explained in ayurveda long back. The anatomical position of prostate gland, symptoms of BPH and its remedies are explained by Acharya Sushruta.
The anatomical position of prostate gland is described in ayurvedic classics as follows... In Yogaratnakara it has been described as -- “ NAABHERADHASTHAATSANJAATAHA SANCHAARI YADI VAACHALAHA | ASHTEELAAVAD GHANO GRANTHIROODHWAR MAAYATA UNNATAHA || “
Which means “ Below umbilicus (NAABHI), there is a hard gland which is little bit bulged and changes its place some times and some times stays stationary. This gland is like “Ashteela” (A small stone used to sharpen swords). This gland when affected by vitiated vata causes a disease called “vataashteela” (or benign prostate hypertrophy)
Sushruta explains the structure, anatomical position of prostate gland and symptoms of BPH as follows.
“SHACRANMAARGASYA BASTHESHCHA VAAYURANTARAMAASHRITAHAI ASHTEELAAVADGHANAM GRANTHIMMOORDHVAMAAYATA MUNNATAM|| “
Which means - the place between rectum and bladder is occupied by vitiated vata it affects the easy flow of urine, stools and semen by enlarging the gland “ Ashteela”.
The prostate gland enlarges in all men as age advances. BPH is very common and affects one third of men who are over 50. A person suffering from BPH does not have the increased risk of prostate cancer. Functions of Prostate gland.
One of the main functions of the prostate is to produce a fluid, which contribute to the liquid portion of semen and this liquid allows the sperm to move freely.
The gland is divided into peripheral, transitional and central zone. The overgrowth takes place in central zone which leads to BPH. Effects of BPH Prostate gland surrounds urethra. When prostate gland enlarges, it constricts the urethra reducing the urine flow. The emptying of bladder becomes very difficult because of this. Causes of BPH According to present medical concepts the actual cause of prostate enlargement is unknown. But the causes of BPH are very well explained In ayurveda which is based on tridosha theory.The causes of vataashteela or BPH are explained as follows.
Causes for vataashteela according to dosha theory: vataashteela is caused by vitiated vayu and apaana vayu ( a subcategory of Vayu)
(APAANA VAYU is located in two testicles, urinary bladder, phallus, umbilicus, thighs, groins, anus and colon. Functions of apana vaayu are Ejaculation of semen, voiding of urine, stools, elimination of menstrual blood and expulsion of fetus.)
The vitiation of vayu and apaana vayu is caused by
1. Controlling the urge of urinatio
2. Controlling the urge of defecation
3. Over indulgence in sex
4. Consuming dry, very cold and less quantity of food
5. Old age
6. General weakness
7. Indigestion
8. Physical and mental overexertion
Symptoms of BPH
• Difficulty in starting to pass urine ( hesitancy ),
• A weak stream of urine,
• Dribbling after urinating
• The need to strain to pass urine,
• Incomplete emptying of bladder.
• Difficulty to control the urination urge.
• Having to get up several times in the night to pass urine,
• Feeling a burning sensation when passing urine.
• Passing urine mixed with blood (indication of infection)
Symptoms of vatashteela are described as follows.
“VINMUTRAANILA SANGASCHA TANNAADMAANAMCHA JAAYATE| VEDANAA CHA PARAA BASTOU VAATAASHTEELETI TAAM VIDUHU ||“
The vitiated ashteela gland when enlarged is called as “vatashteela”. This enlarged gland causes
1. Obstruction to easy flow of urine.
2. Obstruction to Easy passage of stools and gas
3. Bloating of Stomach.
4. Pain in bladder.
When the above mentioned symptoms are noticed then one should seek proper medical advice.
Diagnosis
A digital rectal examination will be performed to examine the size of prostate by inserting a finger into the rectum. A distended bladder can be felt per abdomen. Ultra sound examination will be done to determine the amount of urine left in the bladder after urination. Routine urine test will be done to rule out infections.
A prostate gland tissue may be collected using a needle to check for cancerous cells.
Ayurveda tips for SELF-CARE
If symptoms are mild, the following methods can be tried for relief:
1. Vata gets vitiated when natural urges are controlled. Hence do not control the natural urge of passing urine. Urinate when you first get the urge.
2. Go to the bathroom even if you do not have urge.
3. Alcohol, tobacco, coffee increase vata and vitiate it. Hence avoid alcohol, tobacco and coffee, especially after dinner.
4. Vata gets normalized and vitiation comes down when body is warm. This can be accomplished with regular exercises and keeping the body warm.
5. Mental exertion leads to increase of vata. Avoid mental exertion at work place and at home.
6. Avoid foods which cause constipation as constipation causes vitiation of vata.
Other general tips
1. Avoid drinking fluids from two hours before going to bed.
2. Avoid cold and cough medications that contain decongestants or antihistamines. These medications can increase BPH symptoms.
3. Avoid drinking excess amount of liquids. Distribute the intake of fluids throughout day.
Prevention
BPH can be prevented by -
1. Consuming low fat diet
2. Including lots of fiber in diet ( fruits and vegetables which are rich in fiber).
3. Visiting your family physician as soon as you notice any symptoms while passing urine.
Apart from these many effective herbal remedies have been mentioned in Sushruta samhita and Yogaratnakara.
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At one time in my life I lead my marriage under my own understanding of what I thought was righteous and good. I was all-powerful. God? Who’s that? I was rebellious and stubborn to my husband because I was married to my selfish lifestyle and wayward beliefs that kept me from accepting and recognizing God.
I rejected my husband sexually because I often thought all he wanted was sex. How could anyone love me, after all I didn’t like the person who I had become? I rejected God for my life too, and that was the biggest mistake I had ever made.
I wanted to be in control just like most women want to be in control of their destiny and their life. And women do control well. In many marriages today women control the ship with poisonous demands while their husband’s cringe in the galleys like little lost boys who can’t find their way home. This is really happening, folks, and most people take it all in with a grain of salt. It makes movies like Broke Back Mountain come alive in its all its perverted sexuality.
Hollywood filmmakers and the Foreign Press promote and support the woman’s movement by slowly creating men to be distorted wimpy guys. The agenda has been going on for sometime now. It is a slow brainwash movement through the use of Hollywood and TV to make people think it is acceptable to be homosexual. Whether this is done for political reasons or not, it doesn’t matter because it is all in direct rebellion to God of Creation.
I truly don’t believe there are so many perverted individuals in the world to elect this garbage for top performance. These Hollywood programs are rigged. It is a bunch of propaganda to get people to give in and to believe in them instead of God.
Ask yourself this. Did God make another man out of the rib of Adam to be his companion? How could two men make babies and multiply the earth? They would both die old men and creation would be over!! Did God give Eve a penis? Why is woman made with such beauty and sexual care if not to give the “real man” great satisfaction in bed?
[Do not lie with a man as one lies with a woman; … Leviticus 18:22]
Did you know that that according to the Golden Globe Awards the top motion picture in Hollywood this year is about a couple of gay cowboys? This establishes a precedent for Hollywood to continue making more perverted trash. It’s nothing but filth! Is this what you want your children to watch?
When debauched films like BrokeBack Mountain become highly praised for their outright deviance the world is surely living in Sodom. Ah yes, biblical history coming back alive in the world. It happens all the time. I don’t take the bible literally but you don’t have to!! Look at the whole theme of the bible and it will answer all your questions on morality and ethics.
[Do you not know that the wicked will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived; neither the sexually immoral nor idolaters nor adulterers nor male prostitutes nor homosexual offenders or thieves or the greedy nor drunkards nor slanderers nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God. 1Corinthians 6:9]
Why do you think there is so much divorce in this country? Some men are rethinking their own sexuality and deciding to go ahead and give the woman the lead to direct the ship to shore. They are bowing down to the woman’s movement because they have no spirituality, belief and religious conviction within them. They’re not the captains of their own ships because they themselves have no captain! This is the root of the problem. Where there is no God, there is no righteousness.
When a man does not allow God to command his own life he has no direction for his wife and family and cannot lead his home correctly because his heart does not hold the proper guidance of scripture. There is no spiritual conviction to lead the home. The woman will take advantage of her spiritual bankrupt husband and become out of control thinking she is really in control. She will become bossy, stubborn, controlling and rebellious in the marriage because she has been brainwashed into believing she is superior to her male counterpart.
You see this happening in Hollywood films all the time. You see it on TV every single night. Women being belligerent in the home, ignoring her children, committing adultery because she wants to have her own career and live the way SHE WANTS. It doesn’t matter what God wants for her.
Neither spouse realizes that the home only needs proper spiritual guidance to lead it according to its true purpose. To love, honor, and commit your self to one another.
It is an unethical philosophy taking over the mind of women today. It is destroying families. It is appalling how this accepted wisdom from the world is overtaking the minds of men. Men should be giving in to God, not some unspiritual woman who is trying to find her own way home and thinks she found it through some meaningless woman’s movement.
I believe that if a woman of the home can see clear enough to take her role as wife and mother seriously by acknowledging the spiritual Christ within her soul, she will see the truth for what it is. She doesn’t know that the truth will set her free from her self and that the unethical movement she is believing in is in direct rebellion to God and is untruth - a lie told by satan to break marriages apart.
[God made them male and female and said, “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh? So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate. Mathew 19:4]
She must FIRST fix herself before she can love the man she married. She will discover how unique she is of her husband in a good way, and that she can compliment and help buildup her husband rather than constantly battle with him for her missing self. She should not be hesitant to be the beautiful creature God made her to be.
[Then they can train the younger women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God.] Titus 2:4-5
Bottom line is marriage is not designed to accommodate two captains. Have you ever seen two captains charting one ship? Have you ever seen two Chief Executive Officers controlling one corporation? Have you ever seen two master chefs in one restaurant? Have you ever seen two dentists in one office? Have you ever seen two train conductors guiding the train? You get my point, right?
What can a man do when his wife abuses his manhood and won’t let him lead? He desperately needs to become the spiritual leader of the home and take the lead in that arena now! Accept God for you life! Study the bible diligently and seek out all that God wants for you and your marriage. A man will never truly be happy until he realizes his purpose and calling in life and then goes after those things with gusto.
[Therefore everyone who hears these words of mine and puts them into practice is like a WISE MAN who built his house on the rock. The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against the house; yet it did not fall, because if had its foundation on the rock.] Matthew 7:24-25
~~
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As you begin to get older, many men begin to wonder about their prostate health. Prostate health is all over the news and media, and you may even know someone that has been diagnosed with prostate cancer over the past few years. If you are worried about your prostate health, or want to find out ways to help protect it, you have come to the right place. We will go over what this important gland does, and discuss the different options that you have in protecting your prostate health.
First, you must understand what the prostate actually is. It is a sexual gland, about the size of a walnut that is located around the base of the bladder and urethra. It essentially, hugs the tube that carries urine out of your body. This partially muscular, partially glandular organ produces a slightly alkaline substance that is present in semen.
It is important to understand that there are many problems with prostate health that aren’t life threatening. So if you feel that you may have a problem with your prostate, usually shown by a difficulty to urinate, it is important that you seek medical advice. Prostate disease is a condition that can vary from individual to individual. Some simply have an infection that can be treated with medication; others have an inflammation of the prostate tissue, while others simply have an enlargement of the prostate gland. While all of these many indicate cancer at a latter point, they don’t necessarily mean cancer right off the bat.
Getting a diagnosis is the first step to improving your prostate health. Your doctor may perform one or more of the following tests to access the situation. Most of them are painless or may only be uncomfortable. Discuss your options with your doctor if you have a low threshold for pain.
• DRE (digital rectal examination). The physician will fell the prostate manually to look for enlargements and problems.
• PSA (prostate-specific antigen) testing. Your doctor will do a simple blood test to determine your level of PSA. Small amounts are normal, but large amounts could indicate a problem.
• TRUS (transrectal ultrasound). This test uses wave echoes to create an image of the prostate.
• Cystoscopy- where the doctor looks through the urethra with a thin, lighted tube.
• Biopsy- a small tissue sample is collected from the area and studied.
The key to preserving your prostate health is go get proper treatment early on. Many men are ashamed to seek treatment, which can ultimately lead to further complications. Prostate disease and cancer are easily treated as long as you get diagnosed early on. At the first sign of pain or discomfort contact your doctor immediately. Men over the age of 50 should get their prostate checked out at least once a year. Find a doctor that you are comfortable with, and make sure to ask questions. Many patients choose to do research online before they visit a doctor, which will help you ask the right questions during your visit.
